In our lives, one of the things we do is we accept failure very easily, very quickly. Because there is one thing which is failing, and then there is the failure.
So, failing will happen.
There was a time in your life where failing didn’t mean anything. It was acceptable; it was normal. And the part of your life where this happened was when you were learning to walk. So there you were, coming from a place, from a time in which language didn’t mean a whole lot.
So, nobody indoctrinated you into this; nobody gave you a lecture about this; nobody —do you know—you didn’t go out and read some scripture, but you had an urge to walk. And this came from inside of you, and there was no question about it—you wanted to walk!
But you were extremely ill-equipped to walk. You had two legs, but the muscles in that leg that needed to carry you were not developed. You needed a sense of balance. And you didn’t really understand it. And so, a day came in which you made this attempt to get up. And anybody could have told you what was going to happen.
It was not a happening thing. You were going to fall—and you did! And you failed! You…you actually failed—because the first, first part is just getting up. But you kept going—and you would fail! And you would fail, and you would fail....
And finally you got to the point where you could actually get up. And as soon as you got up [demonstrating, wobbling] there was still going to be failure! You were going to fail again. Because now the whole sense of balance starts to kick in, and stabilization, and you know, the nerves are telling the muscles, “Do this, do....”
Because everything is an overreaction, underreaction. Nothing is used to anything—and you are doomed to failure.
But you weren’t a failure because you never accepted failure.
And so you took that one little step, and boomf! You failed—bam! And sometimes the kids even look at the mother, “Should I cry?” You know…you…you—they get to, right to that point of where their bottom lip is quivering and everything, and they’re like... And the mother looks like, “Oh, it’s okay, it’s okay”—it’s like, “Oh, it’s okay.” Brainwashing!
But you just kept failing and failing and failing and failing and failing and failing. Till one day, because you did not accept failure, you did the impossible, and you took that step. And then the next step. And all of a sudden the most incredible transformation took place. And what you just accomplished wasn’t walking. You unlocked the world to yourself. Krrrract! Now you could go wherever you wanted to go. You were free.
So, “fail” and “failure” meant two different things.
Then as you grew up, you started to associate the two; you merged the two. “Failure is always painful—demeaning and painful.” And all your life, your energy turned into “not failing.” So that no failing happens in your life, you would have to become non-human. Not going to happen! You’re human! But there is a way out of this pickle. And the way out is, “Don’t associate failure with failing.”
Do you know what it means to be singular in nature?
It defies nature itself, because nature says, “there can be nothing singular in nature.”
That’s like having a one-sided coin. That would be very difficult to have, wouldn’t it?
In this world, there is so much duality, duality, duality, duality. And then, to have something in your life that is singular in nature. That divinity inside each human being is singular in nature. It has no opposite. It has one thing and only one thing, and it is beautiful.
It is fulfilling. It has no emptiness. It is the light that does not cast shadows. It is that light that has no darkness associated with it. It is singular in nature. It gives, it absorbs, it fulfills, and it is beautiful, always.
- Prem Rawat
I’d like to tell you a very simple little story, and it has something to do with each one of us, as individuals, as we look at ourselves, as we understand ourselves. And the way this story goes is there was a young American Indian, living in a camp. And one day he approached the chief and said, “Chief, I’m confused.”
And the chief looked at him and he says, “Why are you confused? What are you confused about?” He says, “Well, I see some people who are good sometimes and the other times they’re bad! How can this be? If they’re good, shouldn’t they be good? If they’re bad, shouldn’t they just be bad. But sometimes they’re good; sometimes they’re bad. How can this be?”
And the chief looked at the young kid and he said, “It’s very simple. Inside each one of us we have two wolves—a good wolf and a bad wolf—and they’re constantly fighting each other. And that’s why sometimes people are good and sometimes people are bad.”
So this really got the young kid thinking. And he thought, and he said, “Chief, tell me which wolf wins?” And the chief looked at him and said, “The one we feed the most.
I think after you hear that story you just need to go away, sit down in a quiet room for about an hour, and do a little thinking. Because right there that story says, “Things are not that complicated. That this whole achieving that beautiful thing in your life is not that difficult. All you have to do is feed the right wolf.”
But this is where I will interject—that’s not our strategy. Our strategy is not to feed the right wolf. And the story very clearly says, “Which wolf will win? The one we feed the most.” But our strategy is to beat the bad wolf. And this is why we don’t succeed.
Why do we beat the bad wolf? Because this is what, somehow, we have been told: “Beat the bad wolf.” Sounds logical? Never, ever thinking, “Well, ah, what is that going to do for the good wolf? I should, you know, feed the good wolf, so that the good wolf will be strong.”
But, “No, and let, let’s, let’s figure out a way to beat the bad wolf.” And that’s what we do. “Oh, I made a mistake! Oh my God, I made a mistake. I made a mistake! I made a mistake, I made a mistake, I made a mistake. Oh, man, I made a mistake.”
You have to stop that thing that just comes and beats the…—I won’t say the word, but it starts with a “c”, ends with a “p”—out of you again, and again, and again, and day, and night, and influences your dreams, influences your happiness.
That’s life! That’s life—to know yourself, to understand, to feed the good wolf. Feed the good wolf. When you understand the value of today, you feed the good wolf! When you understand the value of yourself, you feed the good wolf. When you lament in sorrow, when you watch your dreams crumple…
Because you created those dreams; nobody else created them for you. You created them yourself.
You created your dreams. Maybe there are better dreams—doesn’t matter. You’ve got to have the good wolf win in your life.
What do you focus on every day? Is it things that make you angry? Is it things that you don’t like in your life? Are you a complainer? Do you complain, “This isn’t right; that’s not right. This should have been this way; that should have been this way; why is this this way; why is that that way? And, ababla-bla-blable, ablabla-blablalba.....”
“Why me?” Are you one of those “why me’s”? So, if you are a “why me”—good luck. That’s not a nice note to end with, “Why me? Nothing is right. Why is everything so unjust?”
Remember Yudhishthir! Same thing, he’s caught in the injustice and he cannot go. He’s caught. The cycle of birth and death, the inconvenience of the birth, and he’s caught in it. Because he’s also caught in his concepts of “what is right, what is wrong, what is right....”
He’s caught up in his concepts of what is right and what is wrong. And this is then driving him to start looking at what is just and what is unjust. And so far he’s going in his life, going, “This is just; this is unjust; this is just; this is unjust,” he’s caught in fear; he’s caught in anger; he’s caught in all those things that he doesn’t really want.
When he frees himself from that, severs those.... I like the word “sever”; just to, “Kkkch,” indiscriminately. Not like, “Where should I do it?” No, just do it. It doesn’t really matter, if you’re going to cut a rope, whether you cut here or you cut it—and just cut the thing.
And then, then that comes; then comes the freedom. Then comes the freedom. And the freedom? And, when you are free, you can feel. Now you are free to feel this life; now you’re free to feel the gratitude; now you’re free to feel what that beauty is.
The life should never be about, you know, three things only. Life is giving you a lot more than three. Take it all! “No, no, we should only have....” Not one.
“What is the most important—well, what is that one most important thing to you?” God knows who started that. But it’s the same people who said, “Take that little ball and put it in the little hole.”
Trying to explain to the aliens, you know, again, “Yeah, they just—somebody has four important things, but this guy only wants three!” I won’t mention your name, Mitch, in case there is an alien.
So, just to keep that focus and continue to enjoy this life, this is what it is. And that is the best way to pay the tribute to what is the past—whatever you have learnt that is good, keep it, and move forward with it.
- Prem Rawat
Individual: [reading question]
“I have done something in my life that I cannot forgive myself for. I killed two of my children and nearly killed myself because of the abuse I was suffering. I want to feel the peace that you are talking about, but I think I have lost the capability to feel it. Is there any chance for me?”
Well, do you think there is any chance for this person?
There is the answer. Sometimes you may have walked too far away from your home. And when she did what she did, she walked a little bit too far away from her home. But her home is still there. And it may be a long journey, and it may take a little while, but the home is still there.
– Prem Rawat
Don’t sit on your living room sofa while somebody’s knocking at the door going, “I wonder who that is. It could be Uncle Tom. It could be my friend Jerry. It could be my friend from India—no, and no, he wouldn’t do.... Hmmh, I wonder who it is? Let me call Prem Rawat! ‘Who is at my door?'"
So, go find out! This is what I’ve said. All along, people have said, “Oh, wha’, wha’, wha’...?” Go find out. Know for yourself. Know it for yourself. And that’s being victorious over the self. You make the rules. You make the rules.
Not just somebody’s.... And, do you know how many people there are in this world who have swallowed the idea of heaven, the heaven that you go to after you die, if you’ve done everything right? Swallowed it, “gulp!” How you could swallow such a big horse pill, I don’t know. But you swallowed it—without water.
Oh.... Heaven? There is a heaven—of course there is a heaven. It’s here. And you need to know it! And so, what is hell? Well, if you don’t know it—and you’re not in heaven—guess where you are! And do you get toasted? Yes, you get toasted. Raked over the fire, absolutely—again and again.
And there you are. One day you find yourself totally devastated and destroyed. And somehow you’re put back together again, to have the same experience two days later? Same exact thing: fried, toasted, not any flour, not any oil, just dry-toasted over the great barbecue that you light yourself, that you create yourself. And that’s what happens.
So, the victory over the self: most important, most important. And it’s not so complicated; it’s not sophisticated; it’s not like, “He’eeah-heeeaah, victory over myself."
No—because it’s very simple. First, you begin by knowing yourself. Now that you know yourself, easy to gain victory over yourself. This is not about swords and dragons. This is about, "very simple, very practical."
- Prem Rawat